Magda, School of Tantra of the Heart, Formation of Psychodynamics of Relations and Body Communication, 2nd meeting, 2025

In search of the Guru, or myself. I was maturing my decision to participate in the workshops. On the one hand, it was a curiosity about adventure, a desire to learn other perspectives and techniques, and on the other, an inner calling to connect with myself – it wasn’t just about doing some activity, something new, but about getting closer to myself, closer to my heart. I didn’t know where this was leading me, but I knew I was ready to take a step towards a deeper experience of life. The second meeting of Rysia’s formation lifted another curtain. I feel as if I had invited my patterns, beliefs, and behaviors onto the main stage, which now evoke a feeling in my body inviting me to reflect, “Who’s talking? You or…”

I was intrigued by a certain state in my body, bringing me to the moment here, me, now. Stopping to see, feel, experience, and implement a quality in life that can nourish me and those around me, blessings that help me learn to see more broadly, breaking through the all-knowing ego. Like a card I’d drawn… I was terrified at the sight, but as Mario used to say… behind fear lurks a reward, so once I decided not to cling to beliefs about myself or others, I decided to have some fun.

To have fun, amidst all my drama, I decided to look at it all differently, not yet knowing how, but letting go of labels, opinions, definitions, and above all, to look with my heart at this entire process in motion. Somehow, I lived, playing roles, expectations, imposed by myself or others. Maybe it soothed me for a moment, I made up the perfect excuses, but there’s already the awareness that no one will take the responsibility of life away from me, that energy speaks for itself… the awareness that every move matters, that thoughts touch matter.

In one week, I’ve encountered so many versions of myself that I know I’ll surprise myself again… how will I show myself to the world today? Will any of my movements define my identity? They say it’s not worth not taking personally. I float on ice in chaos, discovering who I truly am, sometimes still trying to stop despite the path that invites me deeper.

I know I don’t want mediocrity, so I choose truth that is internally coherent, not to fight, but to integrate.